|
Ingredients for a Happy Marriage
Introduction:
1. The divine institution of marriage is under great distress in the world around us. Divorce rates, from U.S. Census Bureau reports:
· 1920, 1 divorce per 7 marriages · 1940, 1 divorce per 6 marriages · 1960 1 divorce per 4 marriages · 1972 1 divorce per 3 marriages · 1977 1 divorce per 2 marriages
2. I am persuaded that one of the main reason there are so many divorces is because people don’t enjoy their marriages. It’s hard to stick with anything in life if you don’t enjoy. Marriage is no different. Here are some ingredients that will help to make a happy marriage:
I. Understand the Purposes of Marriage.
A. It is so sad, but many marriages are contracted out of lust and not love.
B. When we recognize the biblical purposes of marriage it should help us to see that sex is only a small part of marriage. So, what are the purposes of marriage?
1. To prove needed human companionship (Gen 2:18a). No one likes to be alone in life. a. It is a very ere, nagging feeling. While friendship is very important, there is something special about the love of husband and wife. b. In fact, you could say that w/out companionship man is an incomplete creature.
2. To propagate the human races (Gen. 1:28). God expects those who marry to have children if they possibly can.
3. To help one another get to Heaven (Gen 2:18; I Cor 7:39). One of the main purposes that men and women should marry for is to help one another to get married. Before two people marry, they should ask themselves if this person will help me get to Heaven.
4. To prevent immorality (I Cor 7).
5. To develop spiritually (Eph 5; I Pet 3:7).
II. Let God & the Bible be the Standard for Living.
A. God should be the foundation of every marriage (Ps 127:1; Ps 34:3).
B. Husbands and wives should make it their goal in life to help each other to be more godly.
1. Study the Bible with your mate (2 Tim 2:15; Deut 6:6-9). 2. Pray together and for each other (James 5:16; Lk. 18:1; I Tim 2:8). 3. Put God before each other (Matt 10:37, Matt 6:33).
C. The standard for living in the Home must be God’s word (Josh. 24:15, Prov 12:7, 14:11).
1. Matters in the home must be decided by the word of God (Jer 31:17; Jn 2:5; Matt 27). 2. Mates must help one another to live up to God’s word. 3. Parents must make sure their children do what is right according to the Bible.
III. Be Committed to one another.
A. Committed to leaving father and mother (Gen 2:24).
B. Committed to permanency in marriage (Mal 2:16, Mk 10, Matt 19:9).
C. Committed to face the problems of life together (for better or worse).
D. Committed to provide for one another (I Tim 5:8; Prov 31).
IV. Be Bound by Love (Song 8:6-7).
A. True love is not only an inward feeling; it is an outward expression of your care by your actions.
B. In 1 Corinthians 13 Paul identifies the characteristics of true love:
1. Longsuffering (2 Pet 3:9; this means that the faults your wife has you can deal with). 2. Kind (happy, joyful, pleasant to be around). 3. No envy (does not think evil thoughts or make fun of mate because she is better at some things than he is). 4. No Pride (Prov. 16:18; better than wife, she should be my slave, no respect for her). 5. Not rude (Husbands and wives can be very rude to each other in the way the talk, sticks and stones is not true, tape recorder in home for 6 weeks). 6. Selfless (Phil 2:3-4, Rom 12:10; spends all the money on what he wants and needs and neglects the kids). 7. Not provoked (doesn’t lash out in anger, what if your spouse died tomorrow, would you wish you would have been less provoked to say and do things that weren’t nice?). 8. Keeps no record (too many couples keep a ledger of their mates’ wrongs, Have you heard a husband or wife say, “I remember way back then when you did such and such, and I am not going to let you live it down”?). 9. Is not happy over sin/failure (don’t be happy when your mate fails in some area of life). 10. Sacrificial love (Eph 5:25).
Twelve Rules for a Happy Marriage: Source: Ann Landers 1. Never both be angry at once. 2. Never yell at each other unless the house is on fire. 3. Remember that it takes two to make an argument. The one who is wrong is the one who will be doing most of the talking. 4. Yield to the wishes of the other--as an exercise in self-discipline, if you can't think of a better reason. 5. If you have a choice between making yourself or your mate look good--choose your mate. 6. If you feel you must criticize, do so lovingly. 7. Never bring up a mistake of the past. 8. Neglect the whole world rather than each other. 9. Never let the day end without saying at least one complimentary thing to your life partner. 10. Never meet without an affectionate greeting. 11. When you've made a mistake, talk it out and ask for forgiveness. 12. Never go to bed mad. |