Ingredients for a Happy Marriage
Intro:
1. The divine institution of marriage is greatly misunderstood in our modern world. The rate of Divorce in America proves this point. Notice the change in divorce rates since 1920:
1920, 1 divorce per 7 marriages
1940, 1 divorce
per 6 marriages
1960 1 divorce
per 4 marriages
1972 1 divorce
per 3 marriages
1977 1 divorce
per 2 marriages
2.
One of the main reason there are so many divorces is because people don’t enjoy
their marriages. It’s hard to stick
with anything in life if you don’t enjoy.
Marriage is no different. Here are some ingredients that will help to
make a happy marriage:
I.
Understand the Purposes of
Marriage.
A. Sadly, too many marriages are contracted only so that the husband and wife may enjoy sexual privileges.
B.
When we recognize God's purpose
for marriage it will help us see that sex is only a small part of marriage. What
are the purposes of marriage?
1.
To provide needed human companionship
(Gen 2:18a). No one likes to be alone
in life.
a.
Loneliness is a very ere, nagging feeling. While friendship is very important, there is
something special about being loved by and loving a husband or wife.
b.
Without companionship husband
or wife we are incomplete creatures.
2. To propagate the human races
(Gen. 1:28). God expects those who marry
to have children if they possibly can.
3.
To help one another get to
Heaven (Gen 2:18; I Cor 7:39). One of the main purposes of marriage is for
husband and wife to help one another get to Heaven. Before two people marry they should ask themselves,
"Will this person help me get to heaven?".
4. To prevent immorality (I Cor
7).
5. To develop spiritually (Eph
5; I Pet 3:7).
II.
Let God & the Bible be
the Standard for Living.
A. God should be the foundation of every marriage (Ps 127:1; Ps 34:3).
B. Husbands and wives should make it their goal to help each other develop spiritually.
1. Study the Bible with your
mate (2 Tim 2:15; Deut 6:6-9).
2. Pray together and for each
other (James 5:16; Lk 18:1; I Tim 2:8).
3. Put God before each other
(Matt 10:37, Matt 6:33).
C.
God's Word must be the standard
for the home (Josh. 24:15, Prov 12:7, 14:11).
1. Matters in the home must be
decided by the word of God (Jer 31:17; Jn 2:5; Matt 27).
2. Mates must help one another
to live up to God’s word.
3.
Parents must make sure their
children are trained by the Bible.
III.
Be Committed
to one another.
A. Committed to leaving father
and mother (Gen 2:24).
B. Committed to permanency in
marriage (Mal 2:16, Mk 10, Matt 19:9).
C. Committed to face the
problems of life together (for better or worse).
D. Committed to provide for one
another (I Tim 5:8; Prov 31).
IV.
Be Bound by Love (Song
8:6-7).
A. True love is not merely an inward feeling. True love is an outward expression of your care by your actions.
B.
Paul identifies the characteristics
of true love in I Corinthians 13:
1.
Longsuffering (2 Pet 3:9).
2. Kind (happy, joyful,
pleasant to be around).
3.
Not envy (does not think evil
thoughts or make fun of mate because she is better at some things than he
is).
4.
Not prideful (Prov. 16:18;
better than wife, she should be my slave, no respect for her).
5. Not rude (Husbands and wives
can be very rude to each other in the way the talk, sticks and stones is not
true, tape recorder in home for 6 weeks).
6. Selfless (Phil 2:3-4, Rom
12:10; spends all the money on what he wants and needs and neglects the kids).
7.
Not provoked (doesn't lash
out in anger, what if your spouse died tomorrow, would you wish you would
have been less provoked to say and do things that weren't nice?).
8. Keeps no record (too many
couples keep a ledger of their mates wrongs, Have you heard a husband or wife
say, “I remember way back then when you did such and such, and I am not going
to let you live it down”?).
9. Is not happy over
sin/failure (don’t be happy when your mate fails in some area of life).
10.
Sacrificial love (Eph 5:25).
Twelve
Rules for a Happy Marriage. 1. Never both be angry at once. 2. Never yell at
each other unless the house is on fire.3.
Remember
that it takes two to make an argument. The one who is wrong is the one who will
be doing most of the talking. 4.
Yield
to the wishes of the other--as an exercise in self-discipline, if you can't
think of a better reason. 5. If you have a choice
between
making yourself or your mate look good--choose your mate. 6. If you feel you
must criticize, do so lovingly. 7. Never
bring
up a mistake of the past. 8. Neglect the whole world rather than each other. 9.
Never let the day end without saying at
least
one complimentary thing to your life partner. 10. Never meet without an
affectionate greeting. 11. When you've made a
mistake, talk it out and ask for forgiveness. 12. Never go to bed mad. Source: Ann Landers